Reclusive Artists

Natural Habitat: The Hollywood Hills; Wyoming; The Middle of Nowhere
Scientific Name: Tractare Cubo
Diet: Royalty checks; free publicity; time
Specimen: W. Axl Rose
See Also: Sly Stone; J.D. Salinger; Terrence Malick

Now, I'm not here to criticize these people for being reclusive. If they don't want to be public figures, they don't have to. If they don't want to work or write or perform or create art, that's fine too. It's their money, it's their time. But to promise us new material and then make us, their fans, wait an eternity for it is some kind of torture.

Take Axl Rose for instance. Guns N' Roses' last studio album was 1993's The Spaghetti Incident? Technically, their last album of new material was Use Your Illusion II in 1991. That's 17 years. Axl's been promising us a new album titled Chinese Democracy for well over a decade. Well, Axl, where is it?

The problem with these artists is that, because of their status and success, they think they don't have to be held to any kind of standard or timetable. As far as musicians go, I think five years between albums is almost too long, let alone fifteen. Sure, I'm all for artistic integrity, but when you keep the world waiting for your next supposed masterpiece just because you get lazy or because you alienate your collaborators, it doesn't exactly help your image. On some occasions, it honestly is a case of being meticulous about the work that causes it to delay and delay and delay. But when multiple people arrive on the project only to leave years later, and the thing STILL isn't done, something must be wrong.

I'm not harping on Axl Rose personally. That isn't what I'm here to do. I simply don't understand how any one project, be it a film, an album, a work of art, or a book can take fifteen years to produce. There are licensed automobile drivers in this world who weren't even born the last time Guns N' Roses were thought of as relevant. We know from his past work, and the work of the others listed above, that he's capable of some pretty great things. That's why if Chinese Democracy is anything less than a masterpiece of rock music, I, and the rest of the music loving world will be sorely disappointed.

Though, let's not kid ourselves, it wouldn't exactly be hard to outdo most of the bands that have popped up since 1993. But if Chinese Democracy fails, it'll prove that reclusive artists like Axl Rose are the worst kind of time wasters and mismanagers on the planet, not to mention the Worst People in the World.