Stand-up Coach Passengers

Specimen: See below
Natural Habitat: The back of the airplane, but right in front of you.
Scientific Name: Erectus Viator
Diet: Impatience

There's a certain hierarchy that operates each and every time an airplane lands and comes to a stop at its gate. The people in the front get to disembark from the plane before those in the back of the plane. That's how it is now, that's how it's always been. So why, why, why, do the people at the back of the airplane always stand up as soon as the plane comes to a stop? Do they really think there's a chance they'll get to get off the plane first?

Now normally, I might agree with the consensus and say that I wouldn't want to be on an airplane any longer than I have to. That's absolutely true. But for those in the back to stand up first is not only counter-productive, it's downright rude. I, personally, stay seated until it's my turn to get up and leave. I know from experience that standing up leaves you nowhere to go but back in your seat, and it makes you look like a jackass.

Unless it's an emergency, there's no need to stand up as soon as the plane lands. If you're at the back of the plane, it makes you look like an impatient, pompous jackass. It also makes you look like one of the worst people in the world.